Many parents find themselves encouraging their children to participate in activities. For Jerry and Debbie Backes, it was much the opposite — their children pulled them in with them.
It began in 2000, when their oldest son, Zach, a first-grade student, went home brimming with excitement.
“He wanted to join Cub Scouts,” Debbie said. “I said, ‘OK, that’s a dad thing. You go do it.'”
Jerry went with Zach to a meeting, but he wasn’t sure about supervising rambunctious Cub Scouts as young as kindergarten.
“I went to that first meeting and all them little fellas running around … crazy, doing stuff, not paying attention, and I said, ‘I gotta have more organization, I can’t,'” he recounted with a laugh.
“You can’t not let him do Scouts, we’ve got to be involved,'” Debbie told Jerry.
So Debbie and Jerry traded off at first, then Debbie took over attending meetings with the children and serving as a den leader.
Once their sons made it to Boy Scouts, Jerry said it was more his speed. He enjoyed spending time with the boys outside and camping and watching them learn.
Today, both are veteran leaders with Scouts BSA, even after their sons made Eagle Scout and went off to college. Jerry serves as an assistant scoutmaster, a unit commissioner and the district commissioner for the area, and Debbie is a committee chair and representative for a local troop, a unit commissioner and a coordinator for the merit badge university.
While their sons helped bring them in, it’s the values of Scouting that have made them stay.
“I think the big thing about what has kept me in Scouts and working with Scouts is the values that it teaches the young people,” Jerry said.
A lot of people think Scouting is just camping, Jerry said.
“The camping part is really not teaching camping. It’s to teach them life skills — teach them how to do things, how to be prepared, how to lead other Scouts on those campouts. It’s a method, it’s not the end,” he said.
Children in Scouts learn how to serve others, solve problems, and make mistakes and recover from them.
Parents on Scouting excursions often struggle with watching their children make mistakes.
“Parents have to learn that they’re not in charge anymore, the Scouts are,” he said. “That’s hard for a lot of parents because they don’t want to see their kids fail. Nobody wants to see their kids fail. But it’s really not failing, it’s learning.”
Jerry said it can also be a place for youth to find role models.
For their children, it’s been a place to learn, grow and make lifelong friends.
Jerry said he loves to see Scouts that were his son’s ages grow up and turn into good citizens.
“They have jobs, they’re parents, they have kids,” he said.
Debbie said she continues to serve with the Scouts because of how it impacted her children.
“It’s been dear to my heart. I’m trying to give back to kids for what others gave to my kids,” she said.
Now retired, Jerry had served as an engineer with Ameren for more than 40 years. These days, he can be found along a riverbank, fly fishing and chatting with people he meets there. Jerry taught Debbie to fish as well, and she often joins him.
Jerry loves to be outside, and his favorite place to visit is the Grand Canyon. He also loves photography, and teaches the photography merit badge. Having grown up in the age of darkrooms, Jerry can appreciate the convenience of digital cameras.
Debbie worked for the Department of Elementary and Secondary Education with state schools for the severely disabled, and then was a stay-at-home mom to her sons.
She is a collector of nativity sets, frogs, thimbles and flamingos, and she loves all things Christmas. She also enjoys baking and cooking and often volunteers to help coordinate events.
Jerry and Debbie have two adult sons, Zach and Jordan. Both grew up in Scouts while playing sports, a feat Jerry said is not impossible if children dedicate themselves and manage their time well.
Debbie remembered one special summer when Jerry and the boys attended Philmont Scout Ranch, an adventure camp in New Mexico that is, for many, the highlight of their Scouting lives.
“Whenever the boys went out to Philmont, they were scheduled to go for two weeks to Philmont and then come back for a week for summer camp. And before they left they said, ‘No, we’re not going to summer camp.’ They kind of balked at that,” Debbie said. “And then when they got home, they were so excited from their trip to Philmont and the things they’d done and learned; they couldn’t wait for me to get their clothes washed and get down to camp so they could just be with everybody and tell them all about what they had done.”
Both eventually made Eagle Scout, which Debbie said was a proud moment.
Jerry and Debbie have a few proud moments of their own to show for their years of service. Both received a district award of merit and were given the Silver Beaver Award, which goes to those with “exceptional character who have provided distinguished service within a council,” according to the Scouts BSA website. They’ve continued to serve with Scouts in various capacities, helping children learn the values and lessons that Scouting supplies.
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