Hi. I’m not usually here. If you turn the page a few times, that’s where I normally reside. I’m the sports editor here at Daily Trojan, but with Los Angeles finally seeing some rain last weekend, I figured I would talk about one of my favorite songs: “Box of Rain” by the Grateful Dead.
As I’ve gotten older, now at the ripe age of 21, I’ve realized more and more just how uncommon it is to find someone who has their shit together. I suppose there is a comfort in knowing that others are just as lost as I am, that everyone is navigating a pretty difficult world.
My music taste has often been described as vanilla, as it’s mostly composed of “a bunch of old men from the ‘60s.” I play guitar and gravitate towards songs that I can learn to play. Sometimes I pick songs with lyrics that speak to me and drown myself in them, listening or playing them over and over again — “Visions of Johanna” by Bob Dylan is a tune I’m currently swimming in.
When I’m sad or stressed out I’ll play songs that align with how I’m feeling. I listen to a lot of sad songs and I probably always will. Sometimes I wonder if I listened to more upbeat music if I would notice a change in my general mood — but that’s an experiment for another time.
However, a song that does improve my mood, or at least makes me feel introspective, is “Box of Rain” by the Grateful Dead.
Jerry Garcia, the band’s lead singer, certainly knew pain. At five years old he watched his father drown in a fly fishing accident. When he was 19, Garcia was in a devastating car crash with his friend, who was killed instantly. Soon after Garcia formed the Grateful Dead, his mother drove off a cliff.
Comparing life experiences isn’t a fair valuation of what emotions one is allowed to feel. Everyone can’t fully relate to anyone — you only know the experiences you’ve gone through and their effect on you. Jerry Garcia experienced some pretty horrific things, none of which I can relate to and all of which I hope I never can relate to.
But bad shit happens to everyone, good shit happens to everyone and some people are lucky and experience more good shit and others are more emotionally mature than me and process the bad shit in impressively capable ways.
The Grateful Dead brand of smiling Teddy bears and tie-dye shirts is associated with good vibes and positivity. But they’re a lot more than that.
I once was in a shop in San Francisco and noticed that a Dead song was playing over the loudspeaker. I told the guy behind the counter that I liked the song and we talked for a bit about the band. He expressed his distaste for John Mayer, who began touring with some remaining members of the Grateful Dead, and I pretended that I agreed.
As I left the shop, the man told me to “listen to the music.” I didn’t think much of it, other than it was a pretty cool line to drop as a wise old man. I hope I’m a wise old man one day.
Months later, I was sitting in my room listening to music. I was alone in my apartment and sad about nothing in particular, which sometimes makes the sadness even worse.
“Box of Rain” began to play and I remembered a funeral my dad had attended the summer before. The woman who passed loved the Dead and “Box of Rain” played at her funeral. My dad listened to it again, alone, on the car ride home.
So, following the advice of the old man in San Francisco and the actions of my own old man, I listened to the music.
I did not transcend or parade through my apartment shouting “eureka,” but I did take a step forward, if only a small one.
In a life where everything feels so big, from Daily Trojan production to thinking about life after college to social interactions and the many misinterpretations that accompany them, “Box of Rain” helps contextualize the universal experience of existing on this planet.
You should listen to the song. Maybe even pull the lyrics up and follow along — which is perhaps solely the recommendation of a former English major. As with all songs, how you respond to “Box of Rain” will likely vary from my micro-Eureka moment and I’d love to hear what you think. For now, I’ll share a bit about what the song means to me.
“Box of Rain” opens with a description of a pleasant day on earth. The sun is shining, birds are flying about and “no rain is falling from a heavy sky.” The speaker then asks, in what is a repeated but slightly varied chorus:
“What do you want me to do, to do for you to see you through?”
The earth, whom I believe to be the speaker in the song, has provided beauty and comfort for its inhabitants and is wondering, genuinely, what else it can do to ease the difficulties that accompany existence.
The song continues to paint an image of the days that go by — with our quests for purpose and the possibility of finding it driving up through the “splintered sunlight” and “dead dreams.”
The climax of the song occurs when Jerry sings that “a box of rain will ease the pain and love will see you through.” From here the entire song switches. A different chord progression kicks in and the speaker hammers home the point they’ve been making for the entire song.
“It’s just a box of rain.” The earth is literally that, a giant box of rain that we are all stuck on, whether or not you want to be.
“I don’t know who put it there.” Does it matter?
The final four bars are really what speaks to me.
“It’s just a box of rain, or a ribbon for your hair. Such a long, long time to be gone and a short time to be there.”
While life sucks a lot of the time and there is an endless list of things to get sad over, an endless list of problems that need solving, appreciating life is ultimately a choice. “Believe it if you need it, or leave it if you dare.”
It’s not an easy mentality to consistently have. When shit hits the fan, it overpowers much of the good in life. But maybe try taking a walk, stepping into the Box of Rain where the sun is shining. Listen to the music of the birds and the sounds of cars speeding down the street. Watch life happen and appreciate it, because in the grand scheme of time your individual lived experience sure seems like a short time to be here.
“Jam Journal” is a rotating column featuring a new Daily Trojan editor in each installment commenting on the music most important to them.
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